aftermath of home-heartbreak

I have been very hesitant about posting pictures anywhere of my parents' house.  If you need to catch up, read my entry about the house fire that took my parents' home on Christmas night. I think I've been hesitant because it's very personal at a level that I wasn't sure was okay for the blog-world.  A strange realization is that I moved in to this house when I was the age that Kien is now. It's been HOME.  I know that people do not always have the best intentions and I felt that posting pictures would make my family more vulnerable to judgments or something.  Maybe it's silly. But I am finally ready to share some pictures and I hope that it helps me move on.  Every time I go up to the house it's like another punch in the gut and my gut is sick of hurting.  Though it's been nearly two months and my parents are settling in to their rental house, it doesn't seem real.

I took these pictures this weekend...

The cabinets were WHITE

The cabinets were white and the back splash was green tile

Kien's toys were in a cabinet

Harry Potter didn't survive the Avada Kedavra curse this time

Patio chairs

Where Kien's rope swing hung

My (deceased) uncle painted this of my great uncle

My dad

poor Barbies

What remains of the Christmas tree

Two mugs up front are a couple I got my dad on my travels seven-ish years ago

My dad's Powerbook

laundry day

No earrings

I once said that someone could know something is wrong if I'm spotted without earrings on. Well I'm currently without my dangly friends. I obviously didn't mean to forget earrings, I feel incomplete without some huge thing hanging from my earlobe. When I miss something like putting on earrings, its a sure-sign that something isn't right.

I had a great Christmas. Kien and Brayden's grandparents all came over, Kien loved his presents, we all ate and drank mimosas and bloody marys and laughed and spurted out ridiculous spiritual theories and had a great day. My parent's left about 6:30 and Ryan and I were getting the boys ready for bed so we could snuggle up with Christmas movies on the couch. It was an amazing holiday. Amazing until about 7:15 Christmas night. 7:15 was when my mom opened her garage door from the kitchen to find flames. 7:15 is when she screamed at my dad "FIRE". 7:15 is when she called 9-1-1 as she ran from her home. 7:15 is the last time she'd see her house in one piece with green walls and brand new bamboo floor.

Everyone is fine, physically.

Physically our bodies are unharmed (with the exception of my knees because I tripped over the fire hose when I got to the fire). Physically. And we are thankful for that. Thankful and grateful and all of that relief that comes with seeing your family after you could have lost them.

The house is gone, physically. In spirit it will always be there. There's no changing memories of a place. Of a home. A place that was home for so long. January would make 19 years since my parents bought the house. They just finished a 2-year long remodel on it. Last week they had a solar water heater installed.

BUT we need to look forward. No more looking BACK, no more dwelling on the past. FORWARD.

Over the last two days I have witnessed a community coming together for a single family, and I've seen some of the biggest hearts I've known. It's inspirational to say the least.

Physically o.k,
Lyn

http://www.hawaii247.com/2011/12/26/christmas-day-fire-destroys-home-and-porsche-in-waikoloa/