sickies, babies, and sick babies

Well a couple weeks slipped me by while I blinked. 

Kien caught a cold just a couple days before Halloween, infected Brayden, and now I have been fighting it since.  I think I've finally failed.  For the most part it's a super sore throat, and I can handle THAT. But now I'm mutating to the nasty cough and extreme irritability.  Okay the irritability might not be related to my cold at all. 

Brayden sleeps all night, I've gone over that I think.  It's AMAZING that he has slept an average of 12 [uninterrupted] hours each night.  While he first got his cold, there were two nights that he woke up around 3 am and I fed him because he's sick.  Well his cough got worse this weekend, so when he woke up today at 3:00 I fed him and snuggled him for a bit.  He dozed off for three seconds.. and he's still awake. It's 6:00. Ryan's alarm clock is beeping.  This baby has had me up for THREE hours.  And I was trying to fight off this cold.  At 5:30 I finally decided not to fight him and just to stay awake since I'd need to get my morning moving along in such short time anyways.  So I'm wiped out and have some killer cramps, a foot that feels broken, and I'm running on four hours of sleep.  But guess what?! I'm gonna keep truckin' on.  That's what mommies are supposed to do right?

Now I am not even going to attempt to say that Ryan is not an amazing dad, man, and husband, because that would be a lie.  He's the best.  But when this man gets sick OMG he's more of a baby than our babies are.  I WANT to be able to take care of him and I WANT to love on him so much that he feels better.  But when he feels the need to tell me every little whiney symptom while he sleeps in bed, during which time I'm ALSO not feeling well, not bitching about it, and functioning for the boys, it makes me mental! I know it seems kind of selfish, and I can't explain what I want. I think I want to feel acknowledged since I'm working my best to appear strong and healthy while I feel like hell inside.  There's also a huge chance that I'm just wicked jealous because I would love to be able to sleep it off all day in a closed-door bedroom while the boys are taken care of.  I often wish I could take some Nyquil and conk out for 14 hours.  

Oh by the way Brayden just fell back to sleep O_O.


Sick and Tired (literally),
Lyn

ALRIGHT I swear that is enough bitching.